When we were younger
Our woolen school sweaters had nametags imprinted on them
Using sharp pointing needles
And some brightly colored thread
To tell Mohammed’s from Mohamed’s sweaters apart.
During the day Mohammed and Mohamed were friends
Played cops and robbers
Though at home they were told stealing was wrong
It was just a game
So it didn’t matter
That Mohammed was a villain
With his army of 9 year old body guards
Robbing other 9 year olds at gun point
With AK47’s only visible to them
Or curved out from the branches of the tree
That stood right in the middle of the playground
Dropping pistachio sized rock bombs on large building molded from sand
It was just a game
And so Mohammed enjoyed being public enemy for 20 minutes.
Was left to save the day
He had to bring these terrorists to the station
Before the 20 minute break ended
To answer for their crimes
Under the shade of the tree at the far end of the school field
Where they’d each serve their time in a cells
Drawn into the ground using a sharp stick and rings of dried leaves.
Without wasting time
He’d start driving around the whole city
Accapella sirens on
Through the swings
Down the slide
Round the supernova
Up and done the climb over
Driving at 100k/ph knowing if he didn’t run
Drive fast enough
He’d be mocked all day for being slow.
When the little brass bell tinkled at half past three
All hell would break loose
It was the only time where a little confusion
Would turn the two friends enemies
You see the difference between Mohammed and Mohamed
Was that their names were spelt differently
One was spelt with a double m and the other with a single
So it didn’t help
That they both had their names imprinted on their grey school sweater in white.
Mohammed and Mohamed grew up to be great men!
Hardworking, honest, decent men
They both had strength with an iron will
But when they rule with an iron fist
Under a false flag called democracy
It makes no difference how cast-iron your stomach is
Because the taste of blood
And the smell of burning flesh from those lost under stereotypes
Makes you just as sick, as bad food.
See they had no time to iron things out
They just needed an excuse
And when the towers came crumbling down
The optimists saw the glass half full
And instead of mourning the lost lives
Decided to strike when the iron was still hot
And declare their war on terror.
Your war on terror
Turned Mohammed and Mohamed into public enemy number one
Cops and robbers was no longer a game played during a 20 minute break
But a life long constant state with a common denominator
The cops would have different faces
And different personas
But Mohammed and Mohamed
Represented the faces of the terrorism at junctions
Or even at restaurants.
The number of m’s in their names became irrelevant
Because the names Mohamed
Served as evidence of the numbers of murders they must have committed
We all know Muslims are terrorists.
Mohammed and Mohamed learnt that ‘al salaam w’ aleikum’ had two meanings
‘Peace be upon you’
And the socially construed
‘I’m a ticking time bomb… about to take your peace from you’
Their problem stopped being how their name was spelt
But that it was even spelt at all
And so they were asked to have ‘Danii’
Instead of ‘Mohammed’
On their name tags at work
Because “the name Mohammed automatically makes you the enemy
And please don’t get me wrong,
it’s nothing personal.
We just wouldn’t want our customers
Thinking we hire terrorists here now would we?
As for how you look
Try sound less like your people
And more like mine
You’ll be noticed less
And be just fine
Again it’s nothing personal.”
You can listen to this piece on SoundCloud.